[addyxp]

assalaamualeikum,

for almost 6 months i have fallen in love in my first cousin. due to an incident, which i totally not intended too, i told her about my feelings about 2 months ago. alhamdulillah even though i told her, we still remain having a great relationship, since we are like brothers and sisters to each other and mashallah she copes with the fact very well, may allah bless her.

unfortunately for me, she doesnt love me, which is may be because she is still 4 years younger then me and is about to graduate from high school. i assume she still needs time for such issues.

our relationship is primarily based on chatting over the internet and seeing each other when i visit my relatives, but we both remain in distance. we do talk, but not in private, since we both know where we have our limits.

yesterday we talked about this issue that i like her and after that i feel very weird, cannot describe exactly how. it was like thousands of unclear thoughts were rushing through my mind. she asked me how strong my love is to her and i gave her a few examples. alhamdulillah she was totally fine with it, but for some unknown reason i wasnt.

what should i do to cope with it? i hope the question and my issue are clear enough, but if not then i welcome all questions regarding this. jazakallah for your help.

allah hafiz

addyxp

[addyxp]

i would like to mention something, in order to make sure that nobody of you will missunderstand the point.

in case if i should propose to her, its not just because i love her. i am aware that there are certain criterias that should be considered in choosing a partner. when i have gone through these criterias, they all prooved me that she is the right one. she is a very good muslim, she even knows more then i do mashallah, she has a really good reputation, social standing, among our relatives as well as non relatives, since we do chat a lot over the internet, we both got to know each other very well and know how to deal with each other in certain situations that appear. i also know a lot about how she has dealt with her personal issues and it sounded good islamically.

i am certainly not in a hurry to propose to her or to go any further now, but may be in a few years, since i have started just entered university and i also assured her that she doesnt have to worry about anything alike and that i of course will give her all the time she needs and that i will accept if she vows down my proposal.

i hope that certain things are clear with my issue inshallah.

[Fear_Allah]

wa3alaikum asalaam warahmatuallah

Since you say you are both in no hurry then InshAllah you should stop talking to each other. When you feel you yourself ready to take on this responsibility, and have sufficient means to look after her. Then I would advise you to first tell your parents and then go to her family and ask for her hand.

I don’t think it will be too hard, especially that you are related and both families seem to be close. I am sure your family will help and support your decision fully.
It could even help to tell your parents now. Show them that you are mature, serious and will be working hard in preperation.

Allah make it easy. Ameen

[safah]